Whats goin on..

Saw this video today. It made me sad, but more than anything, it made me angry. What kind of a person are you, if the only way to express your own frustration is through bullying others? What personal background justifies hurting a person over and over again? What is wrong with you if take pleasure in making someone break inside?

I've read the comments people wrote after seeing this video. Many were very encouraging and sympathetic. However, many accused him of being a fake. I don't know what's true or not, and frankly I don't care. This story is not fake, this situation is not make-believe and for every story made public there are hundreds of people suffering in the dark.

My thankful everyday

It's the week after Thanksgiving. With so many things in life to be thankful about, it's almost difficult to know where to begin. Over the weekend I have been contemplating what I should write this post about. What is the one stand out thing that I'm extra thankful for? The answer was right before my eyes, but just as with a pair of clean glasses, I looked straight through them, without realizing that even the most beautiful thing in the world would look like a blur without my glasses.

I'm thankful that I just returned from a trip to Camas and Seattle where I spent time with new and old friends I've met throughout the past decade.
I'm thankful that I started my day by driving my husband to a job that he loves.
I'm thankful that I'm healthy and went to the gym for a morning workout.
I'm thankful that I have great health insurance which enables me to get my allergy shots on Tuesdays.
I'm thankful that I could go grocery shopping for a meal with friends tomorrow.
I'm thankful I get to talk to my parents, regardless of our geographical location.
I'm thankful that I'm just about to email my best friend about our upcoming trip to Mexico.
I'm thankful that I get to spend everyday loving who I choose to love and being loved in return.
I'm thankful that the biggest problem in my life is that I gained a few pounds over Thanksgiving.

I'm thankful that I know what really matters. I'm thankful for my everyday.

Sauna Etiquette

As you may have figured out, I'm Scandinasian. I have roots in Taiwan and Sweden. With other words, I'm not from Finland. One of the consequences of being from elsewhere than Finland, is that I don't have as much authority to write about the culture surrounding saunas. However, I feel prompted to speak up.

Even though saunas are inherently Finish, as a Swede you are exposed to saunas from an early age. Most public swimming pools have a sauna facility, many people have saunas in their homes and many Scandinavians will at some point have made the run to a sauna after a quick dip in a freezing lake or after rolling around naked in snow.

There are "rules" surrounding saunas. At a public swimming pool, usually there will be a sauna for men and one for women. You are expected to change out of your bathing suit, shower and only bring a towel into the sauna. As for your private sauna at home or by the lake, it's pretty much the same rule. Since it's usually for both men and women, you're as naked as you feel comfortable with and you bring a towel.

I like saunas. They are not as easy to find in the US as they are in Sweden. So I was pleasantly surprised to find out that my 24 Hour Fitness have a sauna as well as a steam room. Since they are for both men and women it was obvious that everyone would be wearing their swimming attire. Or so I thought...

First of all, the sauna was packed! Only a minority of people were wearing their bathing suits/trunks. The majority of people came straight from the gym floor. After a work out. All covered in sweat. Still wearing their gym cloths. And still in their sneakers! What?!?

I realize that this might seem totally normal to some people, this might even be the norm in the US. But to me, it was too bizarr. I understand that the whole point of being in a sauna is to sweat and that I shouldn't be bothered by gym sweat, but gym sweat and sauna sweat is not the same thing (don't ask me why). I couldn't even make myself go in.

To my relief, the steam room did live up to my expectations. First of all, it wasn't too packed. Secondly, the dress code was as anticipated. It all made sense and I could finally sit down, lean back and relax.

Until today, when I went back to the steam room. It was packed! And people came straight from the gym floor. After a work out. All covered in sweat. Still wearing their gym cloths. And still in their sneakers! This made no sense at all! I can almost wrap my head around my sauna experience, and that being a cultural difference, but sitting fully clothed in a steam room is not rational. Why would you want to get all of your cloths drenched and why on earth would you want to steam your shoes?

I don't know where I'll go from here. The winter is fast approaching. Maybe I'll just have to do without saunas and steam rooms. But I guess I shouldn't complain. At least I can substitute the sauna with some reliable Californian sun.

Useless activities

An activity can be fun, good, necessary, bad, boring and more. We enjoy an activity or get through an activity because it usually has a purpose. But some activities are just plain useless. Specifically two useless activities have grown beyond being merely useless, they have grown into my pet peeves.

Waiting in line and looking for something lost. I can feel the frustration grow just writing the words!

I understand the purpose of a line. It will eventually get me closer to my goal. But the actual activity of standing in line is useless. It doesn't matter if I have all the time in the world, it is still a source of frustration. My husband tells me that it doesn't matter how frustrated I am, I will not get there any sooner. I find it less frustrating when he's not in line with me...

I might hate the activity, but I never cut in line, in fact, I hate when people do. However, there are some "grey-areas" that allow some wiggle room, if you ask me. One is when they open a new cash register. It is anarchy until a new line has formed. The order in which you joined the other lines has no significance at all. My husband vastly disagrees with me on this. So, I only get away with it when I shop alone or if I'm carrying our merchandise and the wallet.

You can find another "grey-area" at, e.g. amusement parks, where they sometimes have a holding area for the next group of passengers waiting for the ride. What used to be a line is morphed into a group and who knows who's first, second or last? In this situation I'm happy to adjust my position to a more beneficial one. I do have a limit on how big of an advancement I am allowed to make and I try very hard not to take it too far. As I said, I hate when people cut in in line.

The second useless activity is looking for something lost. It's great finding what ever you're looking for, but the time spent leading up to that moment is a total waste of time. This activity is a bit different from waiting in line because it has many layers of frustration.

Firstly, you only realize something is lost when you need it. So there's a time aspect to it. Often when you're looking for something you're in a hurry. Secondly, regardless of if you're in a hurry of not, it prevents you from continuing to do what you set out to do because you can't find the thing you need and until you find it you can't proceed or you need to abandone you initial plan. Thirdly and the most frustrating thing is that you're in the situation because you didn't manage to put the thing where you would easily find it. Unlike waiting in line, this useless activity is self-inflicted. I guess, if you have a family or a pet, you could blame them, but more often than not, it is all your fault.

Who is afraid of whom?

Happy Wedding Anniversary to me and my husband. We've now been married two years. It's been two wonderful years, full of happiness and bliss. This could easily turn into a long, never-ending, tribute to my wonderful husband, but it would just be stating the obvious.

Instead, this will be about delusions and the never-ending journey of self-discovery.

Last year we chose to celebrate our anniversary in Sacramento. It wasn't our first choice, but if you realize too late that your wedding day is the same day as Columbus Day, you'll find that most other places of interest are fully booked.

This year we learnt our lesson. A few months ago we booked a small cabin in Big Sur. We were looking forward to a nice weekend of hiking. What a delusion! We don't hike. The few times we've hiked it's been ok, but not particularly great. We are generally gaming and watching movies kind of people.

Last Friday we arrived at our cabin. It was the sweetest little cabin with a queen bed and a half bath. At least I knew myself well enough to know it wouldn't feel like a vacation if I didn't have at least a half bath in very close proximity.

I had prepared a feast of pork skewers and vegetables and we were both pretty hungry when we arrived. We brought with us a whole bunch of fire wood, but little did we know how long time it would take to turn fire wood into charcoal.

While waiting for the fire to burn out my husband suddenly saw a cat in the dried up river next to our cabin. After a closer look, the cat turned out to be a skunk. And the skunk was well within spraying distance. We slowly back away hoping we wouldn't scare it.

After a loooooong wait for the fire to turn into charcoal, we lost our patience and decided to turn our food into charcoal instead. Surprisingly, cooking pork over open flames turned out to be ok. The food tasted great! I'm not denying that starvation tends to elevate any flavor, but we were full and satisfied.

By this time it was pitch black and we were more than ready to turn in for the night. As we were packing away our food I glanced over into the dried up river, just to make sure there were no animals around. What I saw scared the bejesus out fo me. Four pairs of eyes staring at me. A pack of raccoons! I have never met one before, let alone a pack! I had no idea they were that big! I'll admit I panicked and fled into our cabin. I've heard horror stories about raccoons and I was not prepared to add a story of my own!

Fast forward to the next day. We had breakfast and headed out to Andrew Molera Park. We decided on a 8 mile hike along the coast, up a mountain, through some Redwood forest and back. The sun was shining and the trail was beautiful! However, the climb up the mountain was intensely strenuous at times and I had to question why I thought this was a good idea, when there must be a million other things I rather do.

After finally making it up the mountain I was looking forward to strolling down the mountain, through the beautiful forrest. And it was nice, for about 10 min or so. As we strolled down the trail I suddenly saw a snake crossing our path. Not just any snake, but a rattlesnake. This time I actually didn't panic. I told my husband to stop and back up. I informed him about our situation and we tried to make as much noise as possible and eventually we made our way passed the snake. For the reminder of our hike, I had my eyes pierced on the trail and didn't see much of the view. We saw no more snakes, but we did hear another one further down the trail.

We had planned to hike on Sunday as well, but we were both a bit freaked out by our close encounters with nature. Some people pay good money to enjoy nature and be close to wildlife. We are not those people. I've always thought I can handle most situations and that I'm not particularly squeamish, but I am, I absolutely am.

As we packed our bags on Sunday, we decided to leave Big Sur after breakfast. We were done with hiking. Instead we changed our plans and headed to the Gilroy shopping outlet. In the car we decided, for our next anniversary, we're heading to Napa or Sonoma to drink wine.

Bear with me...

As you might have noticed, I haven't blogged as frequently lately. There are actually plenty of things to write about. Since my last blog post I've been to my first book-club, I've been to a Health and Fitness Expo, I've taken a Segway tour in Golden Gate Park, I've done a Ghost Tour in China Town, I've hiked and I've had my first proper run down a mountain (which turned out to be easy on the lungs, but heavy on the quads and knees). But as of lately, I'm pre-occupied with a much bigger project.

So, I ask you to bear with me. I fully intend to continue blogging as frequently as possible, and if you stick with me, I will soon invite you to join me on one of my life's biggest adventures to date (and no, it does not involve babies).

Thanks for reading!

What am I running from?

For those of you who have followed my blog, I just finished another race!! For those of you who don't understand what all the fuss is about, I only need to explain that I'm terrible runner. Some people (like my husband) build stamina like a stroll in the park while others (like me) need several months of running just to be able to finish a 5K (3.1 miles) race.

About 10 months ago I finished my first 5K race. The plan was to register to run 5K races regularly so that I had something holding me accountable. Trusting my self-discipline didn't seem like enough. And boy, was I right! I didn't register for any more races and I stopped running.

Fortunately, I started exercising in general, so when I finally decided to run another race, the uphill battle was not as steep, even though it was still a battle. I finished my first race after 38 minutes and 31 seconds. This race took me 32 minutes and 29 seconds. It would be a huge exaggeration to say I'm a fast runner, but I'm happy with my 6 minutes of improvement.

Have I finally learnt how to enjoy running? No, not really. It's mostly painful and it takes me about 2 minutes before I wish I wasn't running. Do I prefere other forms of cardio exercise. You bet I do! There are many, many other form of endurance training I like more than running.

Have I though about giving up on running all together? No, I can't say I have. I might not enjoy the activity of running but I do enjoy the benefits of it. I've been to the gym regularly since the beginning of the year so I'm used to exercising. However, since I started running I've become better at it. Plus, it's a real calorie-torcher.

Many runners (I still don't consider me being one) claim that running is such a freedom and such a high, it's almost spiritual. I don't know if I'll ever experience that. But, if you want to give running a try, you really should, no matter how big of a hurdle it seems. You know how people say "If I can do it, anyone can". I'm usually not a big fan of clichés, but you have to trust me on this one. If I can do it, anyone can!

Lights out!

My husband is a very creative person and a creative person usually has creative ideas. At any given moment, we usually have at least one project we're working on. A while ago he presented a new idea, a challenge, if you will. How about 48 hours without electricity?

Last weekend we finally made it happen. The whole ordeal required some preparation. We had to agree on the rules, stock up on food and make sure we had enough candles.

Rules:
From midnight Friday/Saturday to midnight Sunday/Monday
No electric devices, such as computer, tv, phones etc.
No battery powered devices, such as flashlights, radios, toothbrushes etc.
No use of lamps, microwave, stove, dishwasher etc.
No car
No hot water
Cold water ok
Fridge and freezer were not turned off, but couldn't be opened

Food:
Bread, Corn Tortillas, Canned Foods (corn, kidney beans, peas, salmon, sardines, spam), Air-dried salami, mushrooms, Laughing cow wedges, salsa, boiled eggs, crackers, beef jerky, protein bars, banans, tomatos, mango, avocado and  Snack Pack Caramel pudding

We stocked up on candles, candle-holders, matches, lighters and we duct taped all the light switches (which turned out to be a necessary on multiple occasions). I also bought a 1000 pieces jigsaw puzzle, as a temporary replacement for our PS3.

Activities:
Long walks, biking escursion, tennis, running, hiking, picnic, swimming, playing cards, jigsaw puzzle, reading (books, articles and magazines), talking and eating.

In summary, we spent most of the weekend outdoors, we went to bed REALLY early, we slept 11 hours the night between Friday and Saturday and we had spam tortillas wraps. The biggest challenge this weekend was the freezing showers. If we would have done this for a week, I would have missed my computer and if we did it for a whole month, I would really miss hot food.

The Swedish Diet Commercial

I friend just sent me this commercial. Apparently it's been running for a while. I'm lost for words. But I am smiling and kinda digging it. When tacky is so tacky it becomes funny, you have to embrace it. I especially love how this commercial made me research the product on Google to make sure it is actually sold at CVS. It is!

We are flooded with commercials everyday and it's rare that an ad is so interesting that multiple bloggers, before me, have written about it. Also, being a Swedish Scandinasian, I love how they went overboard with the stereotype. Are the blonds in the US not blond enough without using blond wigs? ;) I wish they would have thrown in a viking and a moose or two. My only complaint is the turkey. It's not really a thing Swedes do. And if it's going to be authentically blond, it should be authentic all the way!

Btw, this diet is unheard of in Sweden.

Welcomed to the United States

I'm now officially welcomed to the United States. How do I know I am? I got a letter telling me so. Last week something monumental happened. I received my Green Card. And over the past weekend, I realized I live in the United States.

I've been living in the United States for a couple of years now. I've created a home together with my husband and our home feels very much like our home. My visa status has allowed me to stay and live in the United States but prevented me from working. I used to really enjoy working, but I've also really enjoyed my years as an involuntary housewife. I've been looking forward to receiving my Green Card, mostly to regain power to decide over my own choices in life, weather it be working or not.

So, in my mind, the Green Card is a work permit. It allows me to apply for a Social Security Number, it allows me to work and it makes me a fuller member of society, with it's rights and responsibilities. But I came to realize it's much more than that. And it says so, right on the Green Card. In the eyes of the United States, I'm now a permanent resident. A permanent resident.

If I plan to leave the US for more than 12 months I have to apply for a re-entry permit before leaving. Not too long ago, my visa extension was denied and I was asked to leave the country. It's like inviting your self to a party, having the host throw you out but by the end of the night you're asked to move in and never leave.

The journey through immigration bureaucracy is difficult in many countries. Mine has been a real adventure, with ups and downs and a lot of suspense. But all is well that ends well. I imagine I could have grown resentful along the way, but the matter of fact is that I really love my life here and I'm just thrilled that I'm welcomed to stay and that I'm invited to explore even more aspects of life in the US.

I can't wait to go through the US immigrations next time I go abroad. Hopefully I'll be greeted by a officer who will welcome me home. Because the United States is where I live, it's where home is.